Moving on after DV is never easy and setbacks are to expected. Here is one of mine.
An open letter to the one person who might understand this better than anyone else…… I also still can’t think about you with out getting upset. But I also am so sorry for how you’ve been affected and I want to acknowledge you are also a victim in all of this.
Rough–REALLY REALLY rough ideas just to get the words down…… I’m not sure how I feel but the 103 quotes really got me started thinking about abstract ways to vent my abuse besides just hard to read narratives.
A new writing prompt I wanted to try out to tell my story….. It was supposed to be 100 I made it in 103. Close enough.
[L]’s sentencing is a day I will never forget, it is burned into me. I have nightmares about it constantly.
The last time I spoke to [L] in person. The last arrest before his sentencing and and the last time I ever told him I loved him.
The wakeup call. Coming out of my concussion fog, the PTSD building, the trauma bonds confusing. I finally realizied how much I was still in danger from the man I thought I loved.
Admitting my mistakes. To everyone. Finally taking the steps to hopefully save myself before he killed me, I knew if he tried again I wouldn’t survive.
Well, here’s the even harder post about how I took [L] back even after he broke my face.
I’ve been terrified to write since I gave out the URL to my blog. But tonight after driving all day and being completely exhausted the emotions finally overwhelmed the fear of others reading what I had to say so here it is. It doesn’t go anywhere really, it’s just a brain dump getting back into the motion of writing after not doing so for a while.